Never say never

As the parent of an only child, I looked slightly askance or slightly downward at parents who used the television as an adhoc babysitter, plopping their child down in front of it for 30-90 minutes at a time while they checked their email, read a book, made dinner or drank a fifth of vodka. Now, as the mother of two, I see both the desperation and the wisdom in the TeleSitter.



What was once a treat two or three times a week has been become a daily occurence: The Viewing of Diego, the Patron Saint of Bilingual Households. Now entering our view is also Plaza Sesamo, Dora and on occasion, Design on a Dime. Whatever it takes to buy 30 minutes of blessed happiness/stupor for my children, allowing me to clear the dishwasher or make dinner or swiffer the floor for the 5th time that day. I want to go back and apologize to every parent I gave my "oh, we don't watch television" speech, in retrospect so very condescending and an example of Wrong Thinking. I want to light a candle in a shrine to bilingual, educational programming creators who have saved us from ourselves — left without these choices, I may very well have abandoned all reason and allowed Shawn Joaquin to watch some program with bad animation and superheroes and a dearth of counting and letters but a wealth of screaming, fighting and examples of who not to be. Instead, he is learning to sing new songs in Spanish, all about nearly extinct animals, and — thanks to HGTV — good space planning.

Other things we have learned: in Latin America, Big Bird is green and pink and yellow. All Spanish-speaking puppets tend to have gravelly morning-after voices. And Diego, Dora and all of the characters within those two franchises have nearly indistinguishable voices but a great love of the environment and an ability to create a good responsorial with even the most recalcitrant preschooler. Go, Diego, GO! Mil gracias, mi amigo.